::Restless::

Thinking about lots of stuffs that had happened, she really was restless. It was the second day of "school" after winter break and she couldn't really focus on the lectures. Her mind was elsewhere. What was her to do, what was her able to do. Helpless. Speechless. 

In a noisy lecture theater, she was lonely. Breathless, as if there was a big boulder on her shoulder, unable to shed the thought away, unable to tell anybody about it, It was almost suffocating her. 

She prayed silently to Allah to give her some tranquility and she opened the Quran;

(Al-A'raf;7:138-149)

One of the ayah (verse) really gets to her;

سَأَصۡرِفُ عَنۡ ءَايَـٰتِىَ ٱلَّذِينَ يَتَكَبَّرُونَ فِى ٱلۡأَرۡضِ بِغَيۡرِ ٱلۡحَقِّ وَإِن يَرَوۡاْ ڪُلَّ ءَايَةٍ۬ لَّا يُؤۡمِنُواْ بِہَا وَإِن يَرَوۡاْ سَبِيلَ ٱلرُّشۡدِ لَا يَتَّخِذُوهُ سَبِيلاً۬ وَإِن يَرَوۡاْ سَبِيلَ ٱلۡغَىِّ يَتَّخِذُوهُ سَبِيلاً۬‌ۚ ذَٲلِكَ بِأَنَّہُمۡ كَذَّبُواْ بِـَٔايَـٰتِنَا وَكَانُواْ عَنۡہَا غَـٰفِلِينَ

"I shall turn away from My revelations those who magnify themselves wrongfully in the earth, and if they see each token believe it not, and if they see the way of righteousness choose it nor for (their) way, and if they see the way of error choose if for (their) way. That is because they deny Our revelations and are used to disregard them. "

(Al-A'raf;7:146)

Who is she to think of herself that way? What if she falls in the category that Allah mentioned in the ayah; "those who magnify themselves wrongfully in the earth" and Allah will not guide her anymore. Who knows it better that Allah? nobody but HIM!

قُلۡ ڪُلٌّ۬ يَعۡمَلُ عَلَىٰ شَاكِلَتِهِۦ فَرَبُّكُمۡ أَعۡلَمُ بِمَنۡ هُوَ أَهۡدَىٰ سَبِيلاً۬

"Say: Each one doth according to his rule of conduct, and thy Lord is best aware of him whose way is right."

(Al-Israa';17:84)

 Astaghfirullah!

 Astaghfirullah!

 Astaghfirullah!

With that reminder from Allah, her heart was filled with contentment again, Alhamdulillah!